I'm So Bad Ass - Emily

I guess now is the time to discuss why I think I'm a complete idiot. While I may or may not be terrified of needles, I may or may not have just signed up to give blood, which I may or may not be disgusted by.  Oops. I guess this college thing has gone to my head. I mean, I just got absolute control over my life, and now I'm running wild. I'm wearing flip-flops in the rain, eating Triscuts for breakfast, sleeping over people's houses on a monday evening, and painting my nails dark colors.

I know these things to not seem completely badass to you, but they are to me.

Here is a play by play of my day before I give blood:

10:26 - I now have four hours until I conquer one of my largest fears ever.  I am hydrating myself. I have finished my glass of V8, about to drink the left over "Fruitables" juice box from last night, and maybe have another juice box before I leave for math class. During math, I plan on guzzling down two bottles filled with water. I am not really nervous right now. I think I am just concerned about having a developing cold when I give blood.   I have decided not to take any medication in fear that I may not be able to give blood.

1:10 - I now have about one hour before I run back to the dorm with just enough time to calm myself down enough to sit in a chair and give blood.  Again I do not feel terrified, I only feel like I really need to pee about every five minutes. So far I have had, V8, two juice boxes, one water bottle, one glass of lemonade, and one smoothie. I am working on my second bottle of water and my third trip to the bathroom. I honestly have never urinated this much in my life. I have no idea why one urinates four times in an hour after drinking a bottle filled with water, I don't want to know, but I do really want to surgically remove my bladder with a dirty spoon right now.

2:15 - I have t minus 30 minutes until I give blood. I have officially changed my pants, taken off my sweater, and attempted to calm myself down. I have checked online to make sure that I can still give blood. I have my iPod and license in hand, and I am ready to conquer the world.

I walked downstairs awaiting my future.  First, my neighbor went up, was tested, passed, and started giving blood. I was up next. After shakily walking up to the chair, slowly sitting down, and answering many questions about my health,  I was deemed a non viable blood donor.  Before you make assumptions about my health, I do not have an STD. I am not Anemic. My Iron is high. I have not lived out of this country. I have not slept with anyone out of the country.

I cannot give blood because I do not weigh enough.

So much for my new found bad ass attitude.